Wednesday, June 25, 2014

Eliiotisms reloaded

Steve Elliot drops knowledge and humor during daily sessions.
A 2013 fellow warned me about the incredible humor of our director Steve Elliot. She created a list of his best zingers during last year's institute. I decided to continue the tradition. Here are a few: 
  • "There is filtered water unless you want skanky Phoenix water." 
  • "That's what students are doing all day. No, they're sexting." 
  • "Every story for the website should have Justin Bieber in it." 
  • "Cause I'm an idiot."
  • "It's hard to get kids to sound smart." 
  • "I have a Ph.D. and you sound like a klingon."
  • "If you're a female your default name is going to be Kristen."
  • "If you're a male your default name is David."
  • "Beat your kids over the head with salami if they do that."
  • "Don't run some big ass quotes." 
  • "Teaching is weird."
  • "Turn the crap to gold."
 Please comment if you have more.

Candace Bagwell
Heritage High School
Frisco, Texas

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8 comments:

  1. UnknownJune 25, 2014 at 6:17 PM

    Candace,
    These are hilarious. I wish that I had been writing them all down. I think I was too busy laughing.
    Tracy Anderson
    Community High School
    Ann Arbor, MI

    ReplyDelete
  2. singrich2June 25, 2014 at 7:34 PM

    This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  3. singrich2June 25, 2014 at 7:35 PM

    LMAO

    Jillian Singletary
    Harding Fine Arts Academy
    Oklahoma City, OK

    ReplyDelete
  4. Mr. DurfeeJune 25, 2014 at 7:37 PM

    Uh... yeah, Steve. Teaching is weird. My personal favorite.

    -Travis Durfee
    Watkins Glen Central School District
    WG, NY

    ReplyDelete
  5. Ginny MillerJune 25, 2014 at 8:13 PM

    My favorites:

    - "I like Times New Roman. It soothes me."
    - "I don't even know what MLA stands for."
    - "You could teach an entire class based on Seinfeld videos and Dilbert videos."
    - "You're not wrong. You just made bad choices."

    Ginny Miller
    Tupelo High School
    Tupelo, Mississippi

    ReplyDelete
  6. Mr. RewriteJune 25, 2014 at 8:35 PM

    I so enjoy these. Thanks.

    Steve Elliott
    Arizona State University
    Phoenix

    ReplyDelete
  7. UnknownJune 25, 2014 at 9:12 PM

    "The best ethical decisions are made by more than one person. What is our true north?"
    "Barf out the story."
    "A ninja wire service trick is to do a laydown before the speech."
    "It was a dogs' breakfast."

    Pam Shapiro
    Pueblo Magnet High School
    Tucson

    ReplyDelete
  8. BrandonsavageJune 26, 2014 at 5:43 PM

    My favorite was him always saying, "Who cares?" I also love that as I was reading all of these I could hear his voice in my head saying them.

    Dana Savage
    Innovations High School
    Salt Lake City

    ReplyDelete

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